Making excuses is all about comfortability. Instead of facing our shortcomings we make excuses as to why they’re not actually that bad. By being open about your shortcomings and mistakes you’ll be able to improve your relationships, overcome fears, and become more confident.
You’re hiding from the truth
Rather than facing the truth you hide behind excuses. Oftentimes this means making excuses for others, not just yourself. Regularly excusing people’s shitty behaviour is indicative of low self worth.
Although the truth can be hard to accept it’s ultimately more beneficial to you than making excuses for others is. Being able to understand people’s behaviour for what it actually is (a reflection of themselves) rather than what you’re excusing it to be (some tragic fairy-tale where they remain innocent) can really help you to recognise who values you.
You could also be making excuses for your own shitty behaviour as a way to hide form the truth.
Of course you didn’t mean to be horrible to that person, you just have a lot going on and are SUPER stressed, and your constant horrible personality is not actually your personality.
It can be hard to accept but recognising the parts of your own behaviour that aren’t so nice can really help you grow as a person. Just try to avoid the pitfall of self-loathing!
You’re Afraid of the Future
Using excuses to explain away your inaction is a pretty sure sign that you’re afraid of your future. By making excuses for yourself you can remain in your comfort zone thinking that you couldn’t possibly make steps towards your goals because you’re ‘not ready’.
Lots of things could have caused that fear, but making up excuses is just another way of putting off what’s to come, and often times worsening it too. No one ever feels prepared for the future, and confronting changes can be terrifying. But if you don’t at least try you’ll make zero progress. Stop making excuses and start confronting your fears!
You Don’t Want to Upset People
If you’re the sort of person who’s afraid of confrontation then it’s likely that you make excuses out of fear. Instead of actually explaining your feelings or actions clearly you use excuses as a cop out.
By never truly expressing how you feel you’re able to create a false sense of security. Despite how secure you may feel in the moment, you can’t avoid confrontation forever. Doing so typically results in people withdrawing from you, or a huge lack of trust.
It’s easy to tell when someone is lying to you or making excuses for their behaviour. Sure, you might be terrified of telling the truth, but you owe it to those around you to at least try. Personally I’m pretty bad at confrontation and used to avoid it like the plague. But stepping out of my comfort zone and being able to truthfully express myself has improved every single relationship I have.
You’re avoiding Failure
To reach success you have to fail first. Making excuses to avoid your future failures or ignore the fact that you’ve already failed just slows success. The best way to become confident or successful in something is to fail hard and fast.
Rather than spending 5 years taking baby steps and making failures, it’s much more productive to take leaps and make those same failures in a year. We’re often raised to stick near to our comfort zone. Making “smart” life choices, and as a result leading pretty mundane lives. If you know you want to achieve more, but keep making excuses to not even try, then you’re bound to fail.